No Girly Drama

Kristel October 5th, 2007

It’s socially mandatory. When a bunch of women get together, the conversation automatically steers itself towards weight and weight issues. It doesn’t matter who started it, this conversation could go on and on for the next few weeks. And most women who participate in “fat talk” are hardly ever really fat.

I find that almost all the fat talk I’ve participated in involves either sitting in some chichi or snooty establishment where everything is so expensive that looking at the prices on the menu makes me feel like fasting.  Sometimes it happens in a fast food chain while everyone’s gorging on greasy fries and even greasier burgers. The drinks are of course DIET sodas, because nobody wants to gain some unwanted poundage.

Then someone starts it. It can be through a straightforward question:

Girl A: Do you think I’m fat?

Girl B: Ugh, no! You’re like, sooo skinny. I’m fat!

Girl A: Of course not. You’re like Nicole Richie-thin. I mean like pre-baby bump with the dirty guy from Good Charlotte.

Girl B: I know right!

The sad part is that Girl A is actually being honest. Her friend does alarmingly resemble a lollipop. Most of the time the skinniest or one of the skinniest girls from the bunch would start the whole fat-conversation.

Fat talk can also begin with a typical girl-rant.

Girl A: My skinny jeans won’t completely zip up. I feel like my ass is like, completely hanging out when I wear them.

Girl B: I have the same problem with my skinny jeans, I mean, it’s like a frickin’ struggle every morning. And my thighs are huge! Like HAM!

Girl A: I know right.

Girl B: Where’dya getit?

Why they would want to wear skinny jeans when the craze is so OVER it happened like three and a half millennia ago is completely beyond me.

Lastly, it could start with some starlet-thinspiration.

Girl A: Jessica Alba is sooo hot. She’s like the Olsen twins, but with more abs than ribs.

Girl B: I know right. I f**ckin’ hate her.

Girl A: I knoessss!!!! I wanna be like her.

Girl B: Yeah me too. Whattaho!

However way it starts, research has shown that fat talk is actually a very normal female way of bonding. It’s almost as if through self-degrading, camaraderie is strengthened between girls.

Self degradation is a must when it comes to fat talk. It’s a way for women to feel better about themselves. By saying:“I’m fat,” and having the other party say “No you’re not!” even when the first woman to speak actually did resemble a blimp of Old St. Nick, makes everyone feel better.

Studies also show that most women don’t expect women engaging in fat talk to say something good about themselves.

Fat talk can also act as a coping mechanism. With the number of skinny celebrities and models half the size of these waif stars, women tend to feel more self-conscious about their bodies. Knowing that other perfectly normal women feel the same way about their thighs or their tiny tummy bulges increases self-confidence in a woman.

Another reason why fat talk is so common is because it seems like the modest thing to do. By talking about her “flaws” openly (even if they’re pretty much imaginary) a woman would appear modest. In the end, occasional fat talk isn’t really bad, especially when in the company of supportive friends who are ready to lie when you need them to.

Now, I wonder if men have their own version of fat talk. If they did, I imagine it would go like this:

Boy A: Pare, do you think I’m developing love handles? It jiggles kasi when I jog eh. (jumps up and down to demonstrate said jiggling)

Boy B: No naman, p’re. It’s a good thing you only have love handles, ako, I have to worry about my moobs. (man boobs) They’re kinda like bigger than my girl’s breasts. But they’re very soft… Touch it pare!

Boy A: This is wrong in so many ways… (touches Boy B’s moobs) But they are very soft. Yeah…

Hmmm…

• Health , Life in General , Friendship